Adieu 2007

As the clock just struck 12, I have entered 2008. Well as the world dances the night away I sit here in my room like many others on this planet and write this post.

Well, as always, in a hopelessly practical world, the year went past in a jiffy and as always it was good, bad and grey with undertones of awkwardness, embarrassments, shocks, weird feelings, experiences, some really happy moments, meeting some of the most amazing people, reunions with people who are really special now……All this including the embarrassments were special in their own way. Man I can actually playback this year so clearly like a movie reel!

My course formed a very important part of my life. I think mass comm does that to you. It just keeps growing on you. I loved it and unloved it at the same time.

Apart from that my thoughts kept on pacing back and forth like a sort of tornado that kept surfacing whenever I breathed. Some people just can’t go off the mind. Maybe I don’t let them. Abstractions….so many of them..huh!

I have had my share of bouquets and brickbats in 2007

2008 is going to be one of the very significant years as this year I take some of the most imperative decisions of my life. I hope you treat me well – 2008 as I bid adieu to 2007 and enter this New Year with memories that mean a lot.

Revolta

Seeker or Believer? He wondered in a combination of dismay and gladness.

A distant roar threatens to overwhelm the familiar noise, drawing closer every minute. Today Jack just wants to climb the flyover, hit the road and finally merge into the traffic in his green car to reach Revolta- the theatre that plans to stage a musical in a few minutes time.

He takes two tickets and does not wait for his guest to come, instead he enters the theatre alone, with a full blown enthusiasm, a sort of blush on his face that reaches his eyes, making them gleam.

He takes the corner seat and puts the second ticket on the seat to his left, not waiting for her to come.

The lights go off and the musical begins. As it progresses, Jack smiles, laughs, cries and reacts to each line of the musical, the way he had done when he had first seen it.

The musical ends and Jack sees a beautiful girl dressed in a black, who comes up to him and looks at him in deep astonishment and surprise.

“What are you doing here Grandpa? Grandma died last night! You are not behaving like a grieving widower should!”

“I wasn’t here tonight to see the musical. I came here to feel her, the way I did forty six years back on our first date. Revolta was never this beautiful.”

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Well, don’t know from where this came from……….

Birthday

What you want to be, you become.

In a hopelessly practical world

I turn 22 this Saturday.

Today it seems like Meandering Recollections Day

I can almost look past the 22 years

It has been a beautiful journey full of sweat

Well, guess it wont have been beautiful enough without the sweat

I am what I appear to be

(Except for a very small part of my life that I don’t like to talk about)

For you become, what you want to be.

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Some people call me atypical. But what to do, there is a contradiction in my birth date itself! I mean it is the first date of the last month on the calendar! Unlike a few other people, I like birthdays and receive bday wishes warmly. This one is to all the Sparkling Saggitarians.

River in the Boat

The monster cant hurt me if I keep dancing.

My feet dont hurt me anymore as I am used to moving them in so many directions, balancing them in such a way that i dont give them enough time to hurt.

How I want the present Alesea to die and a new one emerge. My everyday plan just does not work on field. Well strategy was never a forte!

But how much i want, she remains there with her own choices, not bothered about what others have to say.

I am not proud of her today. She was scared of her own self.

Today i want to love her enough to let her go.

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The title is a chapter's name taken from 'God of Small Things'

A Tryst with Kasauli

The night is beautiful today. The sky so cluttered with stars that they seem to be pushing each other for space. The coffee mug and the warm wrap keeps me somewhat tepid but it is quite freezing.

What is more beautiful is the calmness of this place. So much so that, I clearly hear my breathing.

The white and the black ‘Ruby’ runs around here as she has smelled milk. But my attention is already clutched by the enormous giant who stands far away from me, his hands sprawled and his eyes twinkling in a manner reminiscent of small bulbs. With a fright of its own the scene is as beautiful as it can get. The mountain looks at me directly in the eye.

It feels cold. Not freezing but cold. The warmth of the coffee reaching inside me through my hands. And ya the idea of romance does flash in now.

I look up, above in the sky. And like diamonds in the sky, the stars are sprawled beautifully but jagged in such a wonderful way. My analysis is broken with somebody calling me inside for dinner. Well that’s one of my friends calling me.

Kasauli is a nice place. Not a typical hill station but a small little place, lets call it a mount; to relax and unwind. Surprisingly, a small part of it, that I saw still is untouched. In the state of a burgeoning real estate boom, a part of it looks as perfect as a designer’s cuts.

The dinner and some self introspection apart from philosophical talks about few other common people in our world (read as bitching), the sleep lingers for long and finally enters me.

And now its time for the ideas. They can kindle to life amid a melody of chaos. Dreams- well they seem to be far away and I want to climb up the rooftop and touch the star.

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The experience was so much like ‘The Daffodills’. I mean I can actually recollect emotions in tranquillity. Not to forget, the place where we were living. A beautiful and cosy cottage owned by a friend. Luxury Personified!

The Shout

Sometimes from atop tall buildings that graze the sky one can view not just teeming cities crawl, walk or run. At times these cities also stagnate and take notice.

I stand today at one of these and shout loud,
So loud that my heart pounds thirty beats in five seconds,
So loud that the thirst gets unquenchable
So loud that I sweat inadequately,
So loud that the black of the night stares at me,
with moon making the droplets near my eyes gleam,
So loud that the cute guy I met today is washed out of my brain completely,
So loud that I want to throw out every flaw of mine through this shout,
So loud that hunger and desperation levels can be increased
So loud that nobody can hear it.

Formula Won!!!

At the entrance to this place, the air is charged with a clamorous anticipation, as if some grand nocturnal pagan ritual is about to begin. But that is all inside the head. Outside it is all calm and serene. I enter with a bunch of friends to dance here. (I hardly know how to dance. Though my training in music does give me that rhythm sense.) The best part about this place is its richness and fresh air to breathe around and chill out. Beautiful sculptures with space sprawled before the eyes. But the dandiya hasn’t begun yet.

Guess we are early today. All thanks to the island girl. She is just a little too punctual, not at all understanding the travails of the standard timings.

So since we are dressed up in nice ethnic ware we click photos, pose variously, eat chaat, check out jewellery and suddenly rinita has lost her phone. Well it was an old phone and she is shortly going to buy a new one but who feels good about the cell getting lost when we practically live with it. I think, more than the boyfriends today, cellphones have started to get the cream of the crop treatment.

Anyways, the mood is totally gone and we are on a search spree. Calls are made and it keeps ringing. Suddenly it is picked up and we finally end up getting the phone from some guy in a red shirt who is profusely thanked by all of us. He tries to flirt a little but to no avail (Polite smartness pays.) And then there is blaring music all the way. We try and tap our feet a bit in regular gujrati style, dandiyas trying to hit the hands, more then themselves. But overall it was fun time surrounded by around 200 bodies, enveloped in traditional gujrati music, swirling around without really knowing how to!

I think it’s the complete feeling of getting elevated that works wonders. Forgetting everything regarding everything. Giving one’s own self a chance to just open up and have fun with one’s own self. Being a seeker, rather than a believer. Just letting it go Believe me it works!!!